She runs into the bathroom, shuts the door and takes out her iPhone to text that guy. The one guy she messages when she needs to feel better. Sometimes she can’t tell if bad things happen and she finds him, or if she makes the bad things happen so she can run to him. Their dependent relationship has spiraled so beyond her control she can’t tell the difference. This isn’t what she’s thinking of as she looks down at her phone though, she is waiting in exasperation to see those three little digital dots that let her know he got her message and he cares. It seems to take an eternity, but finally they come.

There are many reasons to love Sleeping with other people besides the writing and comedic performances. It’s because it touches the saddest most vulnerable places of desire, dating and sex. That entire scene above is relatable and so raw in its truth-fullness, it can be uncomfortable to read.

Watching films has always been a source of inspiration for my writing. Although I never studied film too heavily, I can tell when a movie is character-driven and when those characters have real depth. When they disappear and you become them, that’s it. This is something I go for with my work, so it makes good films an amazing source for note taking on themes and other details that make the people on the page real. My end goal, even with my own memoir, is not to have my reader picture me or my stories, but that I am so good at engrossing them I disappear completely and they see themselves in their own life playing out a story I’ve constructed. Even for one second, couldn’t you see yourself in that stall?

To that note, here are some of the themes (with hilarious script notes) I pulled from the movie as inspiration for future writing.

The Art of Self Sabotage

I’d rather be the bad guy than tell the truth.

I get it, but then again I’m psychotic.

Yes, but approachable psychotic.

How good is this? The art of self sabotage is a theme that plays in so many of our own lives, myself included. We can all relate to this! They nailed it and even got to the why of his self sabotage in that same scene, a theme stories will often explore. Why oh why are we ruining it for ourselves?

Texting Banter

I do have HPV though and I hope it’s the kind that gives you dick cancer.

This is my favorite line in a string of text message conversations masterfully displayed on the screen. This particular text is from a girl stalking the main character. It’s exaggerated but poignant in its representation of the lengths some people will go to in order to be acknowledged (especially if you’re ignoring them after you were both intimate).

Text message communication has its own rules and nuances and for better or worse, it is a monumental part of communication in modern relationships–– especially at the beginning of romantic ones. There are text message conversations I still remember to this day that were pivotal in getting together with my fiancé. Text messaging can be just as important as some conversations had in person.

Fake Boyfriend

When you hang with a guy and do all the boyfriend things except the most important one.

We’re not a couple but we act like one. It’s the oldest story in romantic comedy and it’s obvious to everyone outside said friendship couple where this is all heading. Speaking from my own experience, there’s a reason why so many movies and stories are based on this cliché. Because we are asshole humans who can’t see what’s going on right in front of our noses. We are scared of our own feelings and habitually run away from the good things trying to make their way into our lives. Stories like Sleeping with other people show us, there’s hope for our complicated souls yet.

 

Do you have any real life inspiration you use in your storytelling? Tell me. I’d love to know…